Pizza, such a simple word, such a beautiful dish. (Yes I know, I have been dairy free for 3 months now and I am getting poetic about pizza lol).
It represents so many things for me. It represents the one thing I havent been able to adequately substitute in my life when I had to go dairy free (and soy free and corn free) for A’s colitis.
The fear is very real, that I may never be able to introduce A to the blissful joy that is pizza or more accurately cheese.
Pizza represents more then that though, it represents to me the ultimate take out. If I am having a long exhausting day, which is almost every by the end of the week, I cant just fall into my couch, text P and say pick up some pizza.
I cant have him pick up pizza, I cant really order chipotle, we cant do chinese food or falafel or any of those things. I dont know what oil they use, cross contamination is a real fear and I cant risk being confused about what A is allergic to.
It was a long arduous journey of cutting out everything and eating only rice and vegetables for 4 weeks where I finally discovered that corn made her bleed. I am not backpedaling because I had a moment of weakness and ate out.
I did try eating out, we went to a chinese restaraunt with some friends who knew the owners. The chef accommodated and cooked everything for me in sesame seed oil and yet I could tell A had issues. She threw up and was fussier than usual. All I ate was collard greens sauteed in sesame seed oil and rice, ok and one egg roll but that was fried in sesame seed oil too
I cant eat bread if I didnt bake it because outside of whole foods, all bread has one of those allergens in it. I dont always make it to whole foods because $$$ plus I cant regular grocery shop there so its just added work.
I know I am whining again, but it has been another long day, one where I desperately wished I didnt need to cook but I had to because I needed to eat. This part about the allergies frustrates me the most especially on days like today where I wish I could just collapse into the couch and devour some pizza.