Most people are the same version of themselves when they drive. They are rarely different.
I am used to being alone in my car and rarely have a passenger when I drive. That has led to the evolution of my driving persona.
I sing loudly when I drive because I am usually by myself and don’t have anyone judging me inability to carry a tune.
I gesture frantically and yell enthusiastically at people that abruptly cut me off or drive “aggressively” aka rashly.
I may get creative with my swear words and it may be one of the few times I swear in Gujarati, my once upon a time primary language.
It shocks P, even after all these years. I am now consciously trying to watch my language cuz A is in car with me but old habits die hard.
P thinks I keep my feelings bottled up so much they erupt. I wonder about that though, it is not that I keep them bottled up. I often express them vaguely or subtly and P usually doesn’t catch it.
Am I really keeping so much inside me that it explodes when I am driving because it is the only time I am(used to be) alone?
Sometimes I think I confuse being an adult with losing my voice in real life.
Lately I wonder which one is really me? Maybe they are both sides of me after all so I really have to be the same person all the time? Does that sound weird?